What is the underlying attitude that fuels all conflicts?
(Gen. 6:5; Ephe. 4:26-32; James 1:19; 4:1-12) Blog: Jun. 02-08, 2019
Prepared by Richard A. Marin: Present Truth PO Box 700, Fallbrook CA 92088-0700 USA
REVIEW: We were created for companionship and communion. Lasting relationships should be built upon covenants. Covenants provide stability and predictability because a person’s obligations and privileges are clearly stated and entered into by making vows in the presence of witnesses. The character and ability of the covenant maker will determine the value of their promises. Only when the Gospel of God’s grace is presented to us are we freed to make good choices, so true believers are the most likely to have successful relationships. Only by the indwelling Holy Spirit, which we receive when we believe in Jesus, are we enabled to subdue our sinful natures and form relationships that give glory to God.
The Source of conflicts (Gen. 6:5; Psa. 51:5; Prov. 21:10; Matt. 1:20; Luke 1:35; Rom. 8:17; James 4:1-12; Rev. 16:17)
1. What does James say is the source of all our conflicts? Our sinful desires.
2. When did we acquire our sinful desires? At conception.
3. Who is responsible for us having been conceived with sinful desires? Adam, who willfully chose to break God’s covenant with humanity by eating the forbidden fruit.
4. Is any human being exempt from the curse that Adam brought upon us? No, not one, except Jesus only, who was conceived of the Holy Ghost & therefore had no sinful desires.
5. How long will sinful desires remain in our hearts? Until we are glorified at the time of the seventh plague, shortly prior to Christ’s second coming.
6. If sinful desires remain in us until we are glorified what should that tell us about conflict resolution? That unless controlled by God’s Spirit there will be interpersonal conflicts until glorification & that conflict resolution will involve dealing with our sinful desires until then.
The fuel of conflicts (Prov. 14:17; 29:22; Matt. 5:22; 1 Cor. 13:4-7; James 1:15; 4:1-12)
7. If our sinful desires are the source of all our conflicts how do they manifest themselves? In sinful actions according to James 1:15.
8. What sinful actions that add fuel to conflicts are listed in James 4:1-12? Anger, murder, fighting, unfaithfulness, envy, judging, & evil speaking.
9. According to 1 Corinthians 13 what kind of evil speaking exhibits itself where there is a lack of love? Unkind, impatient, envious, proud, selfish, untrue, and bitter words like: “You are just like your mother.” “You always…” “When I want your opinion, I’ll ask for it.” or reminding the other of past mistakes.
10. What is the underlying attitude that fuels all conflicts? Lack of humility.
11. Whose responsibility is it to make us humble? Our own.
The remedy for conflicts (Prov. 10:19; 15:1-2; 17:14; 19:11; Eccl. 7:9; Eph. 4:26-32; James 1:19; 4:1-12)
12. How does James 1 recommend that we deal with anger so as to resolve a conflict? Be swift to hear, slow to speak, & slow to anger.
13. How does Proverbs 17:14 recommend we deal with conflicts? To extinguish them as soon as they begin.
14. How does Proverbs 19:11 recommend we deal with conflicts? By overlooking the other person’s sin.
15. How soon does Ephesians say that an angry conflict should be settled? Before sundown.
16. What part of conflict resolution do both James, Paul, and Solomon all emphasize? That of controlling our speech (tongue).